Ooof- this one is a doozie! We are all familiar with boundaries - whether we listen to them or not - we know the concept. What we sometimes (me, it’s me but I’m learning!) don’t know is how to make them and how to uphold them even when faced with adversity. It’s challenging to set boundaries in our work, personal lives and even for ourselves - but that’s exactly why we do it. Because boundaries aren’t for anyone else - but YOU! It’s all about your own self preservation and growth. It’s YOUR life - and you control who’s in it and who’s not. Who’s energy you allow and who you choose to block - in order to be your best self.
I have struggled with this - being the people pleaser I am - because I thought being a good daughter, neighbor, friend, girlfriend and even employee or designer - meant bending to others in order to allow them a positive experience from me. But I found that I was showing up inauthentically, trying to act one way but feeling another. Now - it’s not easy to love others selflessly or go out of your way to love others in need - but that’s a whole other ball game. I’m talking: when others ask something of you or approach you - how do you respond? Lately I’ve tried to correct this behavior. Instead of automatically saying “yes!” I ask myself “does this serve the narrative of the type of woman I want to be and want to be known as?” And if yes, then I say yes.
So this week I’m filtering every experience through that kaleidoscope so I can show up more confidently as a woman I feel strongly represents me.
here are a few personal boundaries I’ve set for myself as I’ve discovered more of what I need to be successful:
#1 In the mornings, I have “me time” until 11 am - no work calls just self work 😉
#2 in the evenings, I try to get in bed by 11 pm (the automatic white noise Alexa alarm helps) do my night time skin / bed routine no matter how tired I am. It always calms my spirit before bed.
#3 Making time for exercise every day. Exercise has significantly reduced my anxiety by leaps and bounds. I’m able to show up to work and life as a more calm, stable version of myself - no matter what life throws at me - because I am able to regulate my stress with exercise. I firmly believe that! Eating well and making sure I’m taking vitamins and staying hydrated also help!
#4 No alcohol during the week - I try my very best to maintain this rule so I can stay focused on my personal, health and work goals! Instead replacing with Kombucha or sparkling water to help curb the craving.